Three plus years later, where am I now?
My National Board journey has come to an end but not for too long. I submitted my entries but did not achieve. It did not come as a surprise - imagine how long it took me to admit that. I went into National Board after the most difficult teaching year I ever had. I was ready to call it quits. My district offered NB and backed us with many of the fees. I jumped in ready to learn something new and to be a better teacher.
A better teacher I did become. Unfortunately, during the time I worked on my portfolio, my brother had a stroke and that became a priority for our family. Between taking shifts to be with him at the hospital and rehabilitation, it left me with little time and high emotions. I was also well into my second pregnancy and as any mother-to-be knows, I was exhausted. On the school side of it all, our team decided to departmentalize our third graders. Wow, what a year! I was the writing teacher and taught six sections. I also went on maternity leave during that year. I had many challenges during that time which contributed to a less than a high quality submission and I can own that. Some will say these are excuses. Call them what you want. Believe me, I beat myself up about it enough for the both of us. In an honest reflection, I needed to identify the factors that impacted my results.
I decided to resubmit my entries but ended up going back and forth with it. I had one foot in and one foot out. I quit and started again then quit again. Ultimately, I did not submit any entries. I wasn't ready. Will I try again, yes. When? When the time is right. I have a wonderful support system. My husband is absolutely amazing! Since day one he has backed me up. He takes on the kids and everything else within the house so I could hide out and work on NB. I know that when it's time to start again, I'll be in a better place and still have the support I need. Do I feel like a failure? Yes. How can I not. It is hard for me, maybe all teachers, to start something and not finish. But, I will finish. It's just on pause right now.
I almost forgot about this blog I started, previously called A New Journey. I decided to start blogging again after much talk on Twitter, FB, and listening to some #edchat podcasts. I have a lot of ideas that I think other educators can use and I continuously like to reflect on my teaching so I can improve. We can always be better.
2014-2015 Taking it to the next level!
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